Free My Soul

Yeah

I've been trying to find a reason

To get out of bed

And I've been trying to stay sober

But I drink instead

I'm 38 and I feel like death

But I'm just trying to make my peace

With my nothing left

Pretend I'm happy, got a perfect life

Kids love their daddy

And I made a living off my rapping

It's kind of crazy when I think about it

Without the rapping I'm unhappy

I know people that would switch with me like this

And do it gladly

But is it worth it

To feel emotionally deserted?

I think I struggle with the fact

That deep down, I don't deserve it

My thoughts are twisted like cursive

If not for this I'd be worthless

If I feel a type of way

It's never breaking the surface

I just bury it

These burdens we have

We ain't sharing'em

Just set it down for the rest of this trip

I'mma carry'em

A deadbeat, I feel like a bitch inside

It's embarrassing

The demons in my head

Are like a garrison

Well I've been trying to free my soul

But I sold my life to rock and roll

I've been lost on a slide

Trying to get back home

I can't remember the last time

That I was sober

Always looking for a way to find closure

I lost anything that ever meant anything to me

And it's gone

Lord and it's gone

Yeah, too many problems to count

Swallow my pride, then I bottle it down

This is the deep end and I'm in it now

Who's right or wrong?

I emphasize all my bullshit

And dwell on the past

And it ain't helping that this alcohol

Is still in a flask

And at some point, I know I've done some good

But it's kind of fucked up

Cause I only seem to think about times

I fell on my ass

I only bring up negative shit

When in conversations

And people probably think that I am hatin'

Subconsciously, I'm angry

It's sad, but it has to be true

Maybe I just want other people

To feel as bad as I do

I see the car coming at me

And I ain't planning to move

It's not a gamble

When I've got nothing to actually lose

But, I've been trying to free my soul

But I sold my life to rock and roll

I been lost on the slide

Trying to get back home

I can't remember the last time

That I was sober

Always looking for a way to find closure

I lost anything that ever meant anything to me

And it's gone

Lord and it's gone