Pussy or Mac and Cheese

You know

I'm just not that motivated right now, folks, you know

When you get married and, I don't know, when you get divorced

Whoever tells you they take half, don't know, fuck, they get it all

If you live in this state, they get every goddamn bit of it

I'm just letting you know

My kids were like, "You need a girlfriend"

I go, "You fucking crazy, I'm still paying for the last one"

If somebody came to me right now and went, you want pussy or mac and cheese?

I'd go, fuck, I'm gonna go with mac and cheese

It's just less work, you know what

Pussy is just exhausting, isn't it?

I mean, I like it, don't get me wrong

I just don't like what it's attached to about 90% of the time

I think that was a big problem with my ex-wife, I liked it, she didn't care for it

I tried to get her to eat it in a hot tub one time, and she wouldn't touch it

I don't blame her, it's kind of gamey, tastes like duck

Doesn't it? You really can't tell, you're like, what the fuck? Ah, I can't tell

What's it taste like? Seagull or some shit, I can't tell

That's why we eat it in the dark, you know that, right?

Because if they saw us with the lights on, they'd see us going, ah, fuck

How long do I got to do this shit?

And they're clueless, they're like, it's wet, isn't it? You're like, yeah

Yeah, it's wet because I'm not swallowing this shit

Do you breathe? Do you breathe through your mouth?

It's the same technique you use to pick up dog shit, isn't it?

You know when you pick up, oh, oh, fuck

That's going to be a topic of conversation on the way home when you drive

Do you hold your breath when you lick my pussy?

You're the fucking Rodney, god-damn it

Do you hold your breath when you lick my pussy?

Well, hell, midweek, I got to go back to work, I don't need that shit on my breath

God-damn, but if it's Saturday night, and I'm hammered, I'll lick your butthole, I don't give a fuck

You go down there like a trucker, goes ah-ah-ah-ah

That's the time you're glad that pussy just don't have like purple dye in it

Saturday night, you look like a fucking clown

You been eating pussy? No

Well, it's all over your goddamn face

I'm not that motivated