Caught Big Time

And now my little girl's getting older now

She's starting to ask questions about things

I don't think she needs to know the answer to

Ever

The other morning, we were having coffee together

My wife and I, I'm sorry, not my daughter

You have more coffee? Only fourth grade's starting

No, thanks, Daddy, I'm buzzed

Alright, baby, be sure you color inside the lines today

Color inside the lines?

I'll be lucky to find the paper I got to shake so bad

Hey, I didn't think of that

Here, I have one of Daddy's cigarettes that'll calm me down

So my wife and I were having coffee

My daughter walks in and goes, "Daddy, what is sex?"

Well, after I spit coffee all over the table

And peeled my wife off the ceiling

She's screaming, I told you she saw us

I told you she saw us, I'm like, shut up

She didn't see us, boy

You'd be great under interrogation

We're guilty, we did it, we're sorry

So I turn to my little girl and I go

Baby, I go, where'd you hear this?

She said, Daddy, my friend at school

Said, "sex is when a man and woman kiss and then they wrestle around"

Well, I just depends on how well you wrestle, honey

Once you run along nowadays, don't give mama a pile driver

Little fantasy of mine

She wears a mask, I really don't know who she is

Anyway, so

Anybody ever been caught by your kids

During that little romantic moment?

That's embarrassing, isn't it?

I never thought we'd get caught, we got caught big time

I mean, we were under the covers

We weren't like swinging, from the lamps or nothing

Thank God we'd stop that

That'd have been embarrassing

What are you doing, Daddy? Ho!

Changing the light bulb, honey

Naked? I didn't want my clothes to catch on fire

That light bulb could blow up, poof!, my clothes would be gone

Safety, punkin', safety

But it was just one of those little morning things