Ain't Drinkin' Beer No More

I've had a thing for the hop, think it might have to stop

Ain't drinkin' beer no more

Who knew the work of monks could lead to so many drunks

Ain't drinkin' beer no more

Its time I turn this boat around

Keep gaining pound after pound

I'm going back to shore

Ain't drinkin' beer no more

The woman I call my queen is lately a little bit mean

Ain't drinkin' beer no more

She used to call me "My Sweet," now she just says " Hey... Meat..."

Ain't drinkin' beer no more

It might have been alright in my youth

But she's telling me the bitter truth

It's time I closed that door

Ain't drinkin' beer no more

I'll do what's best for me

And turn to herbal tea

Say goodbye to that fuzzy glow (Oh, no!)

Go to church on Sunday

Start walking right on Monday

I used to feel like a fighter, walk a whole lot lighter

Ain't drinkin' beer no more

Pass on the meat and three, eat greens and fruit of the sea

Ain't drinkin' beer no more

I used to dress myself in style

Could run a seven minute mile

Now I've become a bore

Ain't drinkin' beer no more

I'm driving past the store

Ain't drinkin' beer no more

...that's just about enough of that...

...maybe one for the road...