A Fall Tale

While testing the slickness of tread

On a stair step that's stain had been shed

My foot shot right out

And there was no doubt

That my body turned into a sled

I landed on my left elbow

And the pain came, wouldn't you know

It raced up my arm

And caused great alarm

As I slid to rest twelve steps below

I won't bore you with all the details

In the end, a fine surgeon prevails

Some screws and a plate

Was my HUMERUS (humorous) fate

And soon, I was back on the rails

But the ribbing, it seemed, would not cease

With quips of me flying to Greece (grease)

And other poor puns

Deserving of shuns

Like me having SLIPPED OFF TO SEEK PEACE

— REST IN PEACE —

Here lies Jim, who had no cares

Until he slipped upon the stairs

My kids, the insensitive runts

Grown tired of my painful grunts

Despite all my hurt

Bought me a tee shirt

That proclaimed, "I DO MY OWN STUNTS."

Uncle John, with whom I'm quite chummy

Said something even more crummy

"Jim, claims he's retired

But it seems he's been hired

To work as a STAIR CRASH TEST DUMMY!"

My brother said it was a waste

That I hadn't slipped on some toothpaste

For then, with my bawlin'

I'd have been CREST—FALLEN (crestfallen)

But his words just left a bad taste

And my very own wife, sure enough

Cheekily, said off the cuff

"Knock off your fretting

And attention getting

You shouldn't SWEAT THE FALL STUFF."

"And, besides," she asked, somewhat with glee

"How is it that it came to be

That you came to care

For some slicked up stair

When you've ALREADY FALLEN FOR ME?"

While some might think I am a brat

When I say that their jokes are pure scat

It just seems to me