Runnin' Out Of Excuses

In a snowstorm, I watched the bills lose

In the playoffs, from the common room

On the first night I checked in

Another replay of a lost youth

I thought it was our year, I guess I always do

I'm a stranger in my skin

But I let you down in LA

If there's a way to fuck it up, I'm gonna find it

I'm beaten down, I can't stay this way

I checked in on a Sunday

They took my sneakers and my phone

And my roommate caught me staring out our second story window

He says, "There's no point in jumping kid

Unless you're tryna break some bones"

Says his name is Bobby

It's his third run of the place

I thought the pill lines were just in movies

I thought the nerves were gonna fade

He says, "Hold out for a smoke break

It'll help you with the shakes

Feels like hell, when you get going

But by Wednesday, you're okay"

Oh, I'm writing a love song

I'm singing at brick walls, I'm getting my voice back

Now I'm patching up new faults with resin and sea salt

I'm filling the old cracks

This place smells like a hospital

I got meetings twice a day

I wrote letters to my father

I tried to let go of the pain

I do most of what they tell me

I keep quiet when they pray

So when I walk past the window

I tell the shadow on the wall

What a cosmic fucking miracle

It is to exist at all?

But I never asked to come

So I'm leaving when I want

I still got shit to do

So I'm staying 'til it's done

Oh, I'm writing a love song

I'm singing at brick walls, I'm getting my voice back

Now I'm patching up new faults with resin and sea salt

I'm filling the old cracks

I let you down in LA

If there's a way to fuck it up, I'm gonna find it

I'm digging out, I'm gonna set it straight